To Tinder or Not to Tinder? or How to get Laid using your Smartphone

To Tinder or Not to Tinder? or How to get Laid using your Smartphone

Filed under: 
Sex & Recreation

There is a new, absolutely effortless way to get laid, and what's so great about it is that you don't even need to get your ass out of bed to find your soulmate. Yes, the time of desperate nocturnal hunts is over, thanks to Tinder—a smartphone app, launched in the US, that permits you to browse through the profile pics of sexy fellow users. The way it works is simple: if a chick or a guy is hot, like their photo. And if they like yours back, you can instantly commence your digital flirtations. Who knows where it might lead you... Already 6 people got engaged this way.

When there's a match, the chat can begin

Well, that’s fantastic. Zero effort is needed to get into a hot person's bed. The era of shyness is now over, and you can talk to your 1-minute-old crush without fear of being ridiculously incapacitated. 

But honestly, that shit is weird. I mean, a machine is hooking you up. What happened to "No pain no gain"? Where is the challenge, the satisfaction that you’ve seduced someone by your own means, the pride, the glory, the timeless moment when you finally get what you want? You can flirt at home to get in touch with the people that are supposed to like you, and vise versa. I said, "supposed to like you." Many people see this phenomenon as the glorification of appearance over personality, and although I might sound like a lame old transistor radio, yeah, that’s "today's sad truth". 

Who knows who you're dating, they're sexy psychopaths sometimes...

Yet, think of the hundred times you fell in love in the street. How many times did you tell yourself that you would definitely marry that girl if you had the opportunity to chat her up. One has to admit that almost every romantic or sexual encounter is triggered "at first sight". With Tinder, there are no excuses. So, hey, it's the modern day, and finding a way to have sex without putting in huge amounts of time or money, would not label you as a creepy-geeky-stalker just for having that app on your phone.

So, for every guy who needs a wingman, and every chick who needs a wingwoman, don’t rely on your best friend; Tinder is faster, better, and it won't ever cock-block you.

Share this article

Comments

Content Stream

A second exclusive editorial out of Lima, Perú by photographer Macarena Puelles . Model: Alessandra Denegri Styling: Carlos Chung MUA: Kevin Choi Styling Assistant: José Vilca
Montreal entrepreneurs Zach Macklovitch and Nate Gannage , the creators of event promotion and artist management company SaintWoods and owners of venues Apartment 200, Suwu and École Privée, represent a whole new way of tastemaking, and with that comes collaborative efforts with international heavy...
Andi is a Toronto based artist who is very involved in her music making process, producing original tunes that make you feel okay. She released her debut EP Sketches last year and is currently working on her first full length inspired by issues she sees in herself and in the world. Subjects include...
Wow WayHome Music & Arts , what a weekend that was! We made our way down to Oro-Medonté for our second year in a row to check out this 3 day celebration of stunning performances, art installations and headliners Flume , Imagine Dragon and Frank Ocean . For the past 3 consecutive summers,...
We've had Sara Diamond on our radar for quite some time now. If you are still unfamiliar, get to know her a bit better through our last Q&A with her. Alongside fellow Montrealers Noah Barer and Austin Tecks , she's been cooking up pure pop music that remains with you for weeks on end. The music...
Here we are, Osheaga weekend is over. You've already gotten back to reality, or decided to take that extra day off to fully recover. Unlike other media outlets, I like to experience festivals hands-on. I was able to catch over 24 acts throughout the weekend, which is less than what I had achieved...
Art Direction and Styling: Tobi Ogude Models: Denzel Arthur , Jem Baptiste , Naja Pereira MUA: Marisa Tipkanok Photographers: Glenn Pritchard , Angela Zhang , Abdullah Nazim Follow us on Instagram for your fashion fix.
Handpicked and championed by Spotify as one of their favorite new artists and 'ones to watch' of 2017. 24 year old singer, songwriter and multi-instrumentalist JP Saxe draws creative influence from his grandfather, Janos Starker , a Hungarian-born Holocaust survivor turned GRAMMY award-winning...
EVERY SUNDAY. We feature the best underground tracks & remixes, and most of them are up for free download. We prioritize Canadian producers and acts but it is not exclusive. Every Sunday, we'll round-up all of our favourite remixes and tracks we've received through submissions and lay them out...
Following the release of his latest album Roadhouse 01 , via 512 Productions, Communion Records and Caroline, genre defying singer-songwriter Allan Rayman unveils his much-anticipated music video “Repeat” featuring Jessie Reyez which just debuted on Billboard. Rayman has also announced his largest...
After suffering a skateboarding injury that forced her to go on a brief hiatus, photographer Emma Parry shot this photo series inspired by damaged beauty. Follow us on Instagram for your fashion fix.
Two characters – a young boy and a middle-aged man – are unknowingly connected in their pursuit of self-fulfillment. This is the story that unfolds in the brand new music video from Vernon, BC’s //AMISTAD// for their infectious new single, Conquer . The captivating drawings and animation for the...