To Tinder or Not to Tinder? or How to get Laid using your Smartphone

To Tinder or Not to Tinder? or How to get Laid using your Smartphone

Filed under: 
Sex & Recreation

There is a new, absolutely effortless way to get laid, and what's so great about it is that you don't even need to get your ass out of bed to find your soulmate. Yes, the time of desperate nocturnal hunts is over, thanks to Tinder—a smartphone app, launched in the US, that permits you to browse through the profile pics of sexy fellow users. The way it works is simple: if a chick or a guy is hot, like their photo. And if they like yours back, you can instantly commence your digital flirtations. Who knows where it might lead you... Already 6 people got engaged this way.

When there's a match, the chat can begin

Well, that’s fantastic. Zero effort is needed to get into a hot person's bed. The era of shyness is now over, and you can talk to your 1-minute-old crush without fear of being ridiculously incapacitated. 

But honestly, that shit is weird. I mean, a machine is hooking you up. What happened to "No pain no gain"? Where is the challenge, the satisfaction that you’ve seduced someone by your own means, the pride, the glory, the timeless moment when you finally get what you want? You can flirt at home to get in touch with the people that are supposed to like you, and vise versa. I said, "supposed to like you." Many people see this phenomenon as the glorification of appearance over personality, and although I might sound like a lame old transistor radio, yeah, that’s "today's sad truth". 

Who knows who you're dating, they're sexy psychopaths sometimes...

Yet, think of the hundred times you fell in love in the street. How many times did you tell yourself that you would definitely marry that girl if you had the opportunity to chat her up. One has to admit that almost every romantic or sexual encounter is triggered "at first sight". With Tinder, there are no excuses. So, hey, it's the modern day, and finding a way to have sex without putting in huge amounts of time or money, would not label you as a creepy-geeky-stalker just for having that app on your phone.

So, for every guy who needs a wingman, and every chick who needs a wingwoman, don’t rely on your best friend; Tinder is faster, better, and it won't ever cock-block you.

Share this article

Comments

Content Stream

Personal fave Robert Robert is back at it with a perfectly tuned summer release with visuals to accompany it. His latest video is for the tune "Misunderstood" featuring Anna Majidson . The video follows two girls as they set off into what seems like a road trip to a chalet. Everything seems to be...
Don't sleep on this one. When we layed our eyes and ears on Ouri 's latest release, we did a double-take and got captivated for weeks. Ouri is an electronic producer, DJ and multi-instrumentalist based in Montreal. Her training in piano, harp and cello are what primarily influence her shape-...
We spoke to Grace Lillash , an Ohio teen who's work is bringing the 90's back in a big way. Trying to describe her images is useless, and can only be defined by a feeling - a nostalgia you could only experience while flipping through the pages of vintage magazines or old photos of friends. Her old...
Delphine Lewis escapes winter with a trip to San Francisco with her boyfriend in this film series shot with a Minolta XD 11. See more of her work here . Follow us on Instagram and Twitter for more.
Scouted at just 12 years old, Amalie is living life to the fullest; studying film, exploring the world, and playing dress up with haute couture. We got to chat with our go-to girl for outfit inspiration, check it out! What are you working on right now? I consider myself a creative person, so that...
Montreal native Gab Bois is a 19-year-old visual artist. When scrolling through Instagram's explore page, her images stand out - they make you pause, reflect, and screenshot. In the recent past, she's worked as a model, but is now in university studying to become a teacher. Like many of us, every...
Conflict of Ego is a philosophy with a brand – not the other way around. The brand looks to, quite literally ‘embody’ through design, cut, and textile, the cultural changes at work in our society, aiming to promote a message of acceptance and growth within our multi-racial world. photographer Sayeh...
I had the pleasure of interviewing a role model of mine - Dani Roche , owner of Kastor & Pollux , the full-service digital and experiences agency. At just 16 years old, Dani ran an online vintage clothing store that she promoted through her very popular online profiles, like Lookbook. Ever...
A reminder that the early 2000's was fashion's most perfect era. Thanks for this, Kaley Cuoco.
This Montreal staple built her career as a DJ through starting a weekly called Bass Drive Wednesdays in Montreal, and was well-known to hype up crowds week after week with her eclectic talent of blending all types of genres seamlessly - something not everyone is able to do. Let VILIFY carry you...
EVERY SUNDAY. We feature the best underground tracks & remixes, and most of them are up for free download. We prioritize Canadian producers and acts but it is not exclusive. Every Sunday, we'll round-up all of our favourite remixes and tracks we've received through submissions and lay them out...
Underground New York rapper Gabe Nandez has just dropped his latest video for his single "Comets" and has got us slayed. Video by Losmose Produced by Stereoma http://www.stereomaprod.com/ Music produced by Risky Business https://soundcloud.com/gabe-nandez/co... https://www.facebook.com/GabeNandez...